Chicago - A Fun City....Right?

Our house on most days is, at best, controlled chaos.  There is always someone needing something.  It is uncommon to get through a night without one of them waking us up with one need or another.  So when Scott found out he had to go on a business trip last week, he 'jokingly' was excited to get away for a break.  He looked forward to 4 full nights of sleep, cutting up noone's food but his own at meals, getting out for long walks, and only having to take care of himself.  He was going to Chicago, one of our favorite places to visit, a place we always have fun.  We love to walk along the Magnificent Mile, along the edge of the lake, and through the neighborhoods.  On one of Scott's walks on this trip, he met a young man.  A homeless young man.  During their time together Matthew shared that he had aged out of the foster care system a year ago, at the age of 18.  He said he was removed from his home when he was three and spent the next 15 years moving from one foster home to another and then eventually to a group home (because really, who wants an older foster boy in their home?).  He remained in the group home until he aged out at 18 with nowhere to go.  No people in this world.  He claimed he never wanted to be adopted, never wanted to be let down by another family.  So he is living on the streets of Chicago.  He said he gets a bed most nights in a shelter but with it getting colder, the competition for a bed is making it harder.  The night before, it had rained too, making it even harder and he did not find a bed.  He slept outside in the rain but a positive, he said, is that he does at least own a blanket.  But now it is wet and his biggest problem of the day is trying to get it dried out in case he has to sleep outside again that night.  He said people are pretty good about giving him food most days and that he really does not have to eat that much.  His hopes and dreams in life are to survive each day, day by day.  Nineteen, on the streets, with no prospects in his near future.  I am guessing Matthew does not see the 'fun' in Chicago.   It makes the statistics I hear about the majority of males aging out of foster care ending up in jail or dead seem all too real.  You hear about those 25,000 kids who age out each year in the U.S. as 'slipping through the cracks.'  I heard a speaker say recently that he thinks that phrasing is incorrect.  He said they are not slipping through the cracks but slipping through the church's fingers as we stand idly by.   Matthew needed a connection.  Where were God's people in Matthew's group home?  Where was that one person to care enough to be a support for him when he got out?  These kids need people.  Not even neccessarily to adopt them but to help guide them.  They age out with no life skills and no marketable skills for the job market.  I met a woman recently whose mission is to help kids in our area who are aging out navigate the college application process.  What an awesome mission!  For those who want to go to college, what a gift to give them.  Kids need people who can teach them how to hunt for jobs, how to budget their money once they have a job, how to find adequate housing, how to choose a college or a trade school, how to drive a car, and the list could go on and on.  Some might just want a place at a table on Thanksgiving.  Where do you think Matthew will be this Thanksgiving?  It hurts my heart to even contemplate that.

If you want to help, Sunnybrook Children's Home is a good place to start in our area.  And I promise, there are multiple homes in your area too.  They are inundated at this time of year with people looking for a holiday mission.  So check in with them in January or February.  Build those relationships.  I promise, it will never be something you regret investing your time in.

If you have not read this story, please take a minute to do so.  It is written by a former social worker so it is a slightly different perspective:

http://www.scarymommy.com/the-child-i-didnt-adopt/

As always, I have jewelry for sale at my etsy shop, link on this blog page, and all the proceeds are still going to the Rash family who adopting a boy near and dear to our hearts.  Please help support their adoption and get some Christmas shopping done at the same time!  You can also keep up with new jewelry on our Instagram page @leastofthese127.

Our October

This past week has been a week of rest for our family.  We had run ourselves ragged for a few weeks before that and needed time to recoup.  Our church recognized Orphan Sunday last weekend and we had as a guest speaker Johnny Carr, author of Orphan Justice.  He also held a training for orphan care ministries in the Jackson area which was awesome.  A few days before all of that, we went to a fundraiser for 200 Million Flowers where Robert Gelainas spoke.  Both of these men are huge advocates for vulnerable children and were great speakers.  If you ever have the chance to hear either or both of them, I highly recommend it!  Then a few days later, I listened to a webinar on "The Church as a Partner in Biological Family Reunification."  Ouch.  As I am sure most of you know, the goal of foster care is to reunify the child/children with their biological family.  For me it is hard to think positively about the biological families much of the time though.  And I am very guilty of thinking the worst of them.  It was a challenging webinar with much truth in it.  What a powerful witness it would be if the church truly came along side these parents and helped them with their struggles.  During our Orphan Justice weekend, I learned about a program called Safe Families.  It trains families in the church to learn how to be a support for families in need - before the government gets involved.  Its goal is to help struggling families who have no support network.  They might need someone to help with their child for a day or for a month - it varies from situation to situation.  Bethany Christian Services is heading up the program and has it in 17 states so far.

I have heard several people this past week lament that their churches are not recognizing Orphan Sunday and that they do not have orphan care ministries.  If that is you, I strongly suggest you pray about possibly starting a ministry in your church instead of leaving for another church with one already established.  Pray that your leadership in your church will have an open heart and mind to you starting one.  And let me know if you need materials to give you a jump start!

The kids are all doing well.   Benjamin continues to thrive and enjoy life here in the U.S.  We met friends for a day at the pumpkin patch and had a great time.  Jocelyn had her 8th birthday in October.  Our new boys have been with us for 3 months now and have finally adjusted to our family and the way we do things.  They are getting along with our kids and for the most part have blended right in.  They all loved dressing up as super heroes this week and of course, enjoyed the candy.  In any spare time I have, I am making jewelry (which I enjoy) and selling it to help adoptive families and vulnerable children (which makes me happy to contribute in a small way).  If you have Christmas shopping you need to do, check out my etsy shop.  I can even send you the jewelry gift-wrapped!

Now for a few pictures of our month:

Ellie Grace burying herself in the dried corn pool at the pumpkin patch.

Jocelyn was just a little excited when she realized she was opening a watch on her birthday!

Our superheroes.

First fall fire (the boys had great fun with this!).

All in all, we are having a great time.

And last but not least, since today is officially Orphan Sunday and November is National Adoption Month, think about how you can care for an orphan or a vulnerable child.  It is about so much more than adopting or fostering.  We are not all called to those things but we are all called to care for orphans.  And there are oh so many ways to do that.  Sponsor a child or a family in danger of losing their child.  Help support foster and adoptive families you know by praying for them, taking them a meal, babysitting, or just encouraging them.  Become a mentor to a foster child.  Donate supplies to a local resource room for foster children.  Sponsor a foster child this Christmas.  Support your local social workers who work tirelessly to make decisions for children in your county.  Take them lunch or a cake or a note of encouragement.  They are way under-appreciated.  There are hundreds of ways.  Be creative....and wait for the blessings that will come your way!

James 1:27